Colloquialism: ‘Never put the cart before the horse’ is used to describe a misunderstanding of priorities.
Similarly, never allow yourself to become VULNERABLE or snared by someone who has not established a true level of commitment. To be fair, it’s not always your fault if you’ve found yourself in these shoes. Sometimes it’s the irresponsibility of others. Unfortunately, there are deceptive people out there who will do all they can to provoke certain feelings inside of you – feelings that will make you believe a closeness that doesn’t exist. Now that you know this, I’m not encouraging you to become a skeptic for every new person you meet, but I am encouraging you to do things a bit differently.
If you are meeting someone for the first time or have only been conversing with them for three weeks, there’s no way you should be feeling like you’re in love or you cannot go a day without speaking to him or her. You may not agree with me, but whatever you’re feeling this early in the stage, 99.8% of it is probably not authentic. You’re more than likely on an emotional HIGH because everything thus far has seemed perfect.
Here are a few dating tips to help you put things back into perspective with the person you recently met or for any future suitors:
- Daily Conversation: There’s nothing wrong with talking daily if you’ve just met, but don’t talk for hours each day. If the person is right for you, exercise a bit of patience. This includes texting the person throughout the day, too. You’ll have plenty of time for great conversation later.
- Pet Names: Absolutely unacceptable! It’s unacceptable in both directions. If you embrace this within the first few weeks, it will definitely make you feel much closer than you are. If someone does this, politely correct him or her. They don’t even KNOW you yet.
- Romantic Movies: Avoid them. They will stir and awaken passions that you are not in position to deal with. Rather – catch some comedies, adventures, and mysteries instead. Perhaps an even greater idea would be to just get outside and find something else fun to do.
- Compliments: There’s nothing wrong with this one either IF it’s done properly. Obviously you are attracted to the person and that’s why you’re pursuing or and have accepted the pursuit. Having said that, there’s no need in continuously telling the person how beautiful or fine he or she is. For this time and the next few month, focus on complimenting him or her as a person. As you discover their passions, gifts, talents and abilities, compliment those things.
- Kissing, Holding Hands, Holding Each Other: Why are you doing these types of things with someone you just met two weeks ago??? This definitely stirs and awakens passions and a false sense of security and commitment that doesn’t exist. Instead, establish clear boundaries and invest time building your friendship instead.
These are just a few things to help you along the way. At the end of the day, besides these dating tips, you’ll need to be prayerful and use discernment. “Guard your heart.”